Hoon Without Coffee T-Shirt

0 km/h. Full noise. The kettle is eleven metres away and you intend to make it in record time.

The Hoon Without Coffee T-Shirt is for the ones with a heavy right foot before the first brew. Not reckless, just uncaffeinated. Everything between you and the coffee is straight-line territory, and the hallway knows it.

One decent flat white later and the speed limit makes sense again. Mostly.

Wear it to the driveway. Wear it to the servo. Wear it so the household knows the pre-coffee burnout wasn't personal.

100% ring-spun cotton — soft enough for the fast lane
Lightweight but sturdy
Unisex fit — sizes S to 2XL
Available in 12 colours

⚠️ Driver's advisory: this tee performs best on a full tank of coffee. Speeding up the brewing process is permitted.

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Saute Simmer T/A Ka-fey cafe and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 148 Hunter Street, Newcastle, 2300, NSW, Australia or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.